The dangers of Drunk Facebooking

When I first went on facebook, I went on a mad friend search.   ‘Drunk Facebooking.’    A very, very bad habit, which can end up being embarrassing for both parties involved. because I found (and very quickly deleted) old school mates.  Some of those folk were horrid little creatures in school, who found every opportunity to make me feel like a toad.  But when I've had 5 rum and cokes, I tend to forgive even the most vile of said creatures.  And I tend to forget that I was also a horrid little creature when I find the ex-boyfriends (who broke up with me for a very good reason...).   Take Diana* for example.  In high school she was a beautiful girl (still is), very popular, fantastic grades - the kind of girl that an under achievers' parents would compare her to.  Donna found every opportunity to remind me that I had braces and zits and oily hair, and really bad fashion sense, and two left feet (puberty is a bitch).  Very astute, that girl, but a real mean cow.  One night, after my 4th rum and coke, I found Diana.  Instead of continuing on, I hesitated.  Bad idea.  All the emotions from School came rushing in, and I was forced to get another Rum and Coke.  Which then induced me to click on 'friend request'.  Perhaps she'd like me now that I've got it going on.  The zits are gone, the hair looks great, and I can finally two-step after some intense instruction.  What the hell was I thinking!    Guilt trips, embarassing memories, practical jokes, and outright anger - I'm afraid to Drunk Facebook now as my past comes up and bites me in the the virtual ass.

So say no to Drunk Facebooking - it’s acceptable when you are younger, but as a Married Woman with 2 children, it just smacks of desperation.  I should start up a Facebook page called MADF (You figure that one out)!

I have a friend who has a little over 1800 FB friends!  Insane!  And he actually holds conversations with alot of them.  I don’t know how he keeps track between 1 Dave and another Dave.  Are these friends really friends?  Would it be better to call them Facebook Aquaintences?  Although I would imagine someone might get insulted if the person they thought highly of relegated them to FB Aquaintance Status.  On FB you can have a thousand best friends and never have to worry about the fact that they would probably have something much more important to do if you needed help moving that sofa into your new flat.  It would be devestating wouldn't it, to find out that your thousand FB friends actually don't like you and don't want to hurt your feelings.

I kind of worry about what would happen if Technology crashed.  What would I do without my iPhone!?  What would I do in the mornings if I couldn't check my FB and emails and Twitter!  I would start getting the shakes and gitters!  It reminds me of the movie Johnny Mnemonic , where people are suffering from 'Nerve Attenuation Syndrome" and they get the shakes from information overload.  Perhaps I should start up another Facebook Page - "Hello, my name is Liberty and I'm an iPhone addict."

*Obviously NOT her real name

Breaking up online

Perhaps the worst thing about trying to have a long distance relationship online (either with a Mother, or a lover, or a friend)  is the fact that you don’t know how real the other person’s endearments are.  I can call friends and family 'darling', 'sweetie', and really mean it, but how does I know if I’m being given the runaround so to speak?  Why should I even care? And the disagreements that can happen online can be devestating, because you just never know if the person is 'yelling' while they are typing, or just being matter of fact.  Arguments can me misconstrued, when not held face to face.   

Case in point, the argument with a old friend of mine.  Close enough that we called each other sisters.  She didn’t understand what I was trying to say.  I thought I was being so succinct and generous and she ‘heard’ it differently.  She got enaged, and didn't tell me.  And because I heard of her engagement on FB second hand rather than her telling me to my face, I was so very hurt.  I felt that she should have called me.  I should not have happened to glance at her profile and seen ‘engaged’ in her profile.  It still drives me mental thinking about it.  The argument that ensued was bitter and almost to the point of viciousness.  She broke my heart, but she couldn't see my face to see it, and I was too proud/stubborn to tell her in print.  We agreed to disagree (in print), but we didn't really forgive.  It festered, and when we argued face to face the next time, it all came spewing forth and we fell apart. We are now 'divorced' (perhaps a good way to say it).  And I think that it is partially our 'internet' argument that's to blame (plus my pride, her stubborness, blah blah blah).  I miss her every day.

iHeart my iPhone

The play that I am working on has the title of 'Syberluv'. Working title, as I am not cotent with it. I am exploring the world of cyber relationships, how the internet has affected our relationships. I look at how I use my iPhone, and how much of a hold it has on me. iLove my iPone. Pathetic, isn't it? But it is oh, so much fun.

I sleep with my iPhone next to my head. It’s my alarm clock, my period tracker, my weight tracker, weather forecaster, FB, Email, Yahoo, Twitter, Bus Tracker. And my Cat – tom the cat, my news caster, flashlight, level, ebay, tesco shopper, gps, scheduler, ibooks, recipe book, internet, calendar maps, and oh yeah, my telephone. I love playing with ring tones, currently it's Yoda telling me that there is a message from the Dark Side. I don’t know what I’d do without it. I’d be bereft. Like a constant friend or a loyal dog. It sees the inside of my bra probably more than my husband does! I don’t feel lonely when I’m connected to it = I am connected to people through FB, Twitter, and LinkedIn, email.

What about the relationships I have through my iPhone? I will LOL somebody 5 minutes before I am due to meet up with them in person. (Actually I hate LOL will actually write Laughing out Loud rather than shorten it- that's another thing to explore: Why do I hate ROTFL and LOL and TTYL and other acronyms?)

So are the relationships I have on FB real? Are they just as N.B. on FB as they are in real life? Is LOL just as valid as laughing with the person in the same room together? Ever notice that relationships on FB are so intense? Is living in cyberspace still living?

Intention

I have been inspired by my friend John, who has set an intention and is going about trying to fulfill said intention. I like that. I find I don't set enough goals for myself, or if I do, I let myself off the hook faaaar too often. Not cool. I figure if I make my intentions public, I won't be so quick to let myself off said hook (although this hasn't always worked in the past). So I will state my intention:

I will sit down for a minimum of 20 minutes every day for 20 days to work on my new play. If I can go longer, I will.

I'm finding that it's not writing itself. I have some fantastic ideas, but I let them slip out of my brain as fast as they slip in. 20 minutes might not seem like very long, but it is an eternity when there aren't dishes to be washed, family laundry to be done, homework to be read, fevers to ease. I wouldn't give this all up for a bajillion bucks, but it means that Liberty the Artist only gets to raise her little head for 20 minutes a day. Better than nothing.

Perhaps I'm afraid of failing at this one? It will be a bigger undertaking, taking on another actor, maybe two. Do I pull in the director early, during the devising stage, or do I write it all and maintain creative control. I like the control part - I'm a bit OCD when it comes to that.

I managed to overcome the fear of doing the last show. I can certainly do it again.

Success!

Mother, a la Carte was a great success! We had to extend the run by 3 nights. Liz Strange from Strange Theatre produced the show. Liz, Rachel Amey, and Caitlyn Skinner helped devise the finished writing, and Caitlyn Skinner directed. I performed in a very intimate venue, Word of Mouth Cafe, which actually worked perfectly.

I got fantastic reviews:
The Facebook Page:https://www.facebook.com/?ref=home#!/event.php?eid=179434058764889
You can scroll through the Facebook page to read them. Yes, I'm tooting my own horn, as I am damn pleased about what we accomplished. It's no mean feat to write a play from scratch, and then entertain people by oneself for 40 minutes.

I have begun a new play with the working title of Syberluv. I hope to work with another writer, and will be writing it in a different medium (on a dating site to be exact!)

Wish me luck!

Mother, a la carte: The Beginning

I have written a new Play called My Mother, a la carte. I have dissected her, to serve up with tea and freshly baked bread to my audience. The writing was very hard, I've never written anything before. And terrifying. The idea of acting in front of an audience does not scare me half as much as the idea that someone will also be hearing my words. Why is it so much easier when I act in a play that was written by someone else?

The act of writing a play was definitely cathartic (such a cliche, but so be it). I cried just about every day, sometimes I'd be walking down the street and I'd start up. I hate crying. I hate that feeling of being weak. But it helped, and now I don't miss my Mom as much. I'm just a big baby I guess!

I will add more details, but I have to get the kids to school now.